#turns out there actually WERE pipebombs

[creppersfunpalooza]

here’s some of the funniest occurrences/plots w rps i’ve done except they just get worse

- local fae prince is out on a morally questionable quest to get a love potion from a less than trustworthy source. random person gets dragged along for emotional support.

- there’s just a frat/sorority house for vampires who were turned as teens/young adults where they just hang out and smoke weed. most of them r pretty cool. they probably hunt and feed together too.

- a known and wanted terrorist who goes by the name Kurt Pantaloons opens a pancake diner and he is secretly planting bombs in the pancakes that attach to the inside of the stomach and can only be detonated by remote. employees are only hired if they have never eaten there and aren’t allowed to touch the food. also there’s a lady named Razzlepossum who’s a keyboardist in a band. Also there’s gang violence entirely unrelated to the whole terrorism thing.

- an all powerful robot god thing develops a small crush on a joke character literally called Serial Killer. Yeah.

i think those are the silliest but i’m probably forgetting some

[savventeen]

feelin' thorny

rating: M pairing: seungkwan x gn!reader wc: 0.4k summary: florist seungkwan receives a bouquet from his rival — emotions are had warnings: slightly nsfw discussion, language tags: rival florists, the is the start of an enemies to lovers fic (that i will probably never write), soonyoung says some Wild Shit, reader is actually only mentioned in this sorry a/n: i know nothing about flowers or their meanings i just used google and then made shit up lol (also this was originally a vmin drabble i posted on twt two years ago)

Seungkwan looked down at the bouquet of flowers — beautifully arranged and wrapped in old newspaper and tied with a dainty blue ribbon — gobsmacked.

It was addressed to him of all people.

No one ever sent Seungkwan flowers. Because who would send flowers to a florist? Especially from his rival's shop?

And speak of the devil, the little card carefully attached to the ribbon simply read from y/n <3 in a distressingly elegant calligraphy.

He looked at the artfully arranged flowers more closely. There was an obvious yellow color scheme — hyacinth (jealousy - sport, game, play) and tansy (hostile thoughts, declaring war) and tarragon (lasting interest) arranged neatly around a single tall sunflower (haughtiness) — but a few white roses (I'm worthy of you) were included to help balance it out. It really was beautiful, and some unknown feeling did a little somersault in his chest.

And then the meanings sunk in.

You had just sent him a flower arrangement that essentially said "wow, you're so jealous, fucking fight me" but in the most annoyingly flirtatious way possible. It made Seungkwan want to commit arson.

"That absolute motherfucker."

"Okay, Kwan-ah, I'm confused," Soonyoung piped up from where he was re-poting some ferns in the corner. "Do you want to kill whoever sent those, or fuck them?"

Seungkwan choked on his spit.

Soonyoung blazed on, "Because the words you just said were mean but you look so grossly in love that I'm concerned hearts and rainbows are going to start shooting out of your pores like some kind of homoerotic pipebomb."

Or maybe murder was on the table after all.

"Kwon Soonyoung you are henceforth forbidden from ever opening your mouth inside my shop ever again." He threw one of the many flower-themed stress balls he kept lying around for this exact reason at Soonyoung's head, taking pleasure at the pained yelp Soonyoung let out as he failed to dodge out of the way and sprawled gracelessly across the floor.

Satisfied, he turned his attention back to the bouquet. "And to answer your question..."

The flowers stared up from where he was still clutching them with both hands, judging him. Waiting.

Seungkwan sighed.

"Both. Definitely both."

[mjfass]

Hey there, relatively new to your blog, and I’m hoping you’ll point me in the right direction. I’ve realized slowly over the last several years that im really into wrestling, and like so many others, MJF has captured my attention; even when I wasn’t much of a wrestling fan, I was aware of CM Punk and thought he was cool. So naturally when their feud happened, I also thought that was pretty cool. But, I never cared enough (apparently) to figure out how to actually catch a match. So here I am musing about their feud kind of wondering how it all turned out. I watched a wonderful video on YouTube that sort of cut together all the highlights of the saga, up to a match where Punk pinned Max… it was like maybe the third match between them that was shown in the video. Anyway, I’d really love to know how all that’s goin, and I was wondering if you wouldn’t mind aiding my research with any articles/videos or insights! Thanks for reading my ask!

That was their second match. The first one was at Dynamite February 2nd, 2022, that was won by MJF (he cheated with the help of Wardlow), then they faced each other at Revolution 2022 in the dog collar match, where Punk won (with the help of Wardlow who turned on Maxwell). After that MJF cut a promo where he said that wasn’t over until he pisses on Punk’s grave. Both of them moved on to other feuds. When MJF cut the famous nuke promo, Punk actually went out there to talk to him but Max left the ring. Funny thing is that the entire promo had so many references to the Punk’s pipebomb.

MJF was absent from AEW for a while and he returned at All Out 2022, after “winning” the opportunity to face the World Champion. Punk was celebrating his win in the ring when Max showed up. They didn’t say anything but had a small stare down where we knew they were going to face each other.

Nonetheless… that night… the infamous All Out Media Scrum and then the brawl and, unfortunately, CM Punk was suspended and hasn’t been on AEW tv since that night. They had to change the plans so MJF faced Moxley for the AEW World Championship and won it from him. After that, Max has actually made some references to Punk like this and this, but that’s all. There are rumors of Punk returning soon so… we’ll see what happens. I actually have a tag dedicated to analyzing this feud, you can check it out if you like: here.

[chicxgomade]

I love the way you think. They may have turned you into a Babyface but I'm glad to see that your villanous vein is still there. I might have to consult you in the future, when I have to do stuff like that: since you can't do bad guys stuff, might as well have some fun helping me with it, right? I know the feeling, especially because, nowadays, it's so hard to be a villain and actually be hated (it's not my case, not anymore at least). Not just in wrestling, but also in movies, animes, almost every show. Guess good guys are out of fashion and I totally understand why, they get stale at some point. I'm glad to see you have a good opinion of me and what I did, the feeling is mutual. Those iconics moment... I'll forever carry them in my heart, also today is the Pipebomb anniversary. 12 years ago, I can't believe how many things have changed and how many things stayed the same. Yeah, people can be pretty wild 😂 like, me and Jay were staring at each other at some point, and everyone was like THEY'RE FLIRTING or shit like that. And don't even get me started on the CMJF stuff. I mean I know I didn't help with the whole Dog Collar match because it's easy to consider it kinky, but still, they have a wild imagination. Nah, consider that I always rewatch my matches to figure out what I did good and what I did wrong. Those two? I'll never rewatch them. You just needed one good chance to prove your talent and you nailed it. Rey is one of those people you just can't help but love. He's something else, really, I'm glad I can call him a friend. I think the Puerto Rico thing was deserved and I totally agree with you: in general, that night was one of those night that make you scream I love this business, both as a fan and as a performer. And the fans were so passionate, my god, probably because we don't get to have shows outside of USA very often (and I'm happy to see that this is slowly changing). Really, the atmosphere made me wish I was there with you guys that night. No problem. I don't mean to bring bad luck, but I think you're gonna do good in general, regardless of if you win the briefcase or not.

14 minutes of pure adrenaline. I missed this. But whoever started the Pepsi Sucks chants, I'm coming for you.

[mostlygibberish]

"What kind of fuse is that?" "Cannon fuse." "What the hell you use it for?" "My cannon."

I liked the part with the stewed tomatoes.

Done in the style of an old B Movie creature feature, Tremors turned a ridiculous concept into a hell of a lot of fun. The characters were interesting and actually made wise decisions, which was refreshing. There were some really great practical effects, and the monsters were revealed with solid pacing, escalating the tension at a nice, steady rate.

The monsters looked pretty good, and the idea of a subterranean hunter with abundant patience to wait you out made such an interesting antagonist. There were some really neat practical effects like floorboards warping, the truck being pulled down with its headlights pointed up, and the row of fence posts being sucked below the dirt one after another. 

I loved that the preppers had a gigantic wall of loaded guns, and all the materials at hand to make a bag full of pipebombs. The scene where they shot the hell out of one of the monsters in their basement was excellent. That hammer work at the beginning by Kevin Bacon was truly horrible...

A fun movie with a lot of charm. Great stuff.

[bisexualshrug]

Uh has anyone given you the OTP numbers either SUPERIOR SHIP Paige & AJ? Cause if not I’m giving it to you. 11. 14. & 17. The ultimate lesbians.

11. Do they get married? Who proposes and how?

Okay so Paige and AJ are JUST friends. I mean, technically, they are BARELY even friends. So they are absolutely NOT in love. That’s ridiculous. Actually, Paige just finds AJ really annoying, but AJ like...won’t leave her alone. So, they hang out or whatever. But not because Paige WANTS to. It’s like...forced on her, alright? Back off. 

So, anyways they’ve been kinda friends (NOT in love though) for years. And all of the sudden AJ is pestering her every day about how AJ is lonely and sad when she goes back home. And they should just move into together. Because Paige flies home with AJ more than she goes to her own home (Paige would argue this was not true...she could be wrong). And they are best friends so they would be great roommates. So, after weeks of constant badgering, Paige is like ugh okay fine whatever. Let’s live together. And AJ is happy and excited and kisses Paige on the cheek which is gross and DOESN’T feel nice.

And then AJ is like ok! Let’s pack your stuff and move into my place in Colorado. And Paige is like...don’t you live in New Jersey?? And AJ is like nope ! Moved to Colorado a month ago. Which is exactly when AJ started pestering Paige about moving into together. Which is weird. And makes Paige a little paranoid but whatever fine. Paige doesn’t really care where they live because they’ll be on the road most of the time anyway.

So they move in together in Colorado. And it’s kind of weird. I mean, Paige and AJ aren’t there often. But whenever they are, all the couples in the apartment complex wanna go out with them? And it’s very double date like but AJ assures Paige that everyone knows it’s not. But AJ always grabs Paige’s hand on the not double dates and clings to her and kisses her cheek again. Which is all gross and weird...but Paige just doesn’t push her off because hurting AJ is basically just kicking a puppy. And Paige doesn’t wanna look at her dumb completely NOT cute pouty face.

But everyone in the entire complex is ALSO really weird. They stop her in the hallways and are like “How are you and AJ doing? Still happy? Going strong?” And like...why are these people so intense about roommates?? Paige just lives with AJ. And travels with her. And works with her. And spends almost all of her time with her. But none of that involves sex so they clearly are not dating. And sex with AJ? Ew no no no. Paige is NOT attracted to her. She’s especially not attracted to AJ when she climbs into Paige’s bed at night in extremely tiny shorts and insists they need to cuddle and- whatever okay she doesn’t need to justify herself to you

But then she’s walking back to their apartment with food from AJ’s favorite takeout place one day and their neighbor stops Paige and tries to have a conversation with her. Which is mostly just annoying bc Paige is hungry and also AJ is waiting for her and this is supposed to be their last night at home before going back on the road. But anyways Paige is half listening to this lady when she suddenly asks “How is your wife doing?” And Paige is like great this woman doesn’t even know who she is. So Paige is like “Oh, you must be mistaking me for someone else. I’m Paige. I live in this apartment right here.” And the woman laughs “Oh yes. With your wife! Short one, quirky but very sweet.” Paige freezes and is like “excuse me a moment.”

And then rushes inside her apartment. AJ sees her and grabs the food and kisses her on the cheek. And Paige just stares at her in disbelief. And finally forces out “Why did our neighbor think we’re married?” And instantly AJ drops the food on the counter and freezes. Paige can already feel a migraine coming on. AJ slowly turns around and laughs “About that” and then makes a run for the door. But Paige grabs her by the waist before she can escape and wrestles her down to the couch.

And what follows is the most insane story Paige has ever heard in her entire life. AJ was...trying to common law marry Paige....behind her back. Without telling her!!! Without dating her!! AJ has been trying to MARRY her for MONTHS. She told Paige that she did research and in Colorado the requirements for common law marriage are cohabitation (check), a reputation of being married (check...thanks to AJ telling everyone in their apartment complex of their common law marriage), conduct which demonstrates intent (okay how the HELL did AJ file their taxes as joint MARRIED and Paige DIDN’T KNOW ABOUT IT), and the final one being consent. AJ said she had everything but the last one, which she was working on.

Paige sits on the couch in disbelief, frozen still for an entire 15 minutes. No movement. No speaking. Just staring at the wall. AJ is... she’s CRAZY. She’s INSANE. What the HELL is wrong with her??? Paige is just going to stand up, pack her things, and move the hell out of this apartment. Get the hell out of here while she still can...Wait why isn’t she standing?? GET UP. LEAVE. GET OUT OF HERE. FREE YOURSELF WOMAN.

But the only thing Paige can do is turn and look at AJ. Who is staring at her worriedly with tears in her eyes. Nervously playing with her hair, but eyes never wavering from Paige’s. 

Oh God. Why. Why Why Why

Paige kisses her.

14. Are there any love rivals?

Paige hates CM Punk with a burning fiery passion. Because AJ has this almost hero worship, mentor relationship with him going on. “Oh Punk is so funny. He’s so smart. Did you watch his match last night? Pipebomb pipebomb pipebomb.” If Paige hears “Punkie” one more time she’s gonna punch a hole through a wall.

AJ does not do all of this on purpose because Paige is hot when she’s jealous. And Punk is definitely not in on it (he is. They’re both evil shits).

17. Describe or write a really fluffy scene.

I’m going to save writing an entire Paige/AJ scene later. Although that day might very well come. But not today. Because my marriage description answer was already too god damn long sdlsd

Here’s a description of After Paige Finds Out about the common law marriage. After Paige composes herself, she gives AJ a long, emphatic lecture about how it’s wrong to marry people without their permission and shouldn’t you already be aware of this?? And AJ very seriously listens to her the entire time, looking like she’s absorbing information she’s never heard of before in her entire life. And at the end AJ is just like “Gotcha. No more marrying you behind your back. Makes sense.” And Paige is like how the hell do I wanna kiss this girl right now and not get a restraining order??

But she DOES just want to kiss AJ. And sitting here thinking about it? Okay she also probably wants to hold AJ’s hand more and go on (real) dates and buy AJ chocolate on Valentine’s Day and not ever move out. All the gross disgusting couple stuff. Oh and sex. Yeah absolutely she wants sex. 100%. 

So after finishing her lecture she asks AJ out on their first official date. And AJ squeals loudly and literally leaps in Paige’s arms, legs wrapped tightly around her waist. And Paige closes her eyes and tries to clear every single dirty thought out of her mind. Because they haven’t even been on a date yet, and Paige knows how to treat a woman.

So Paige plans out the date and they get ready in their separate rooms. And Paige snuck out earlier that day and bought AJ this comic series she knows AJ has been wanting for weeks. So she knocks on AJ’s room door and hands AJ the comics. And AJ geeks out and Paige is barely able to stop her from canceling the date to hide away in her room until she’s read the entire series. Then, AJ kisses her in thanks and Paige can feel herself grinning like an idiot. She schools her features back into place bc she’s not some schoolgirl with a crush here. 

Paige takes AJ to an arcade and AJ is like an excited kid. Literally, she spends part of the night actually playing an actual child at airhockey and losing (on purpose to make the kid smile). And Paige plays games with her too but watches her sometimes. And it’s fun. But God...AJ is so beautiful. The night is perfect. AJ has a blast. And she’s carrying around the biggest armful of tickets in the entire place. She’s passing by kids who are staring at her tickets in literal awe.

Then...before they get to the counter. A fan comes up. She’s a little girl. Maybe around 7. And her Mom says she’s AJ’s biggest fan. And AJ grins so wide and shoves all her tickets into Paige’s arms. She scoops the girl up into a hug and excitedly starts talking to her. Even though they were about to leave, AJ plays a few games with the girl and then takes a picture with her. Gives her one last hug. Then walks over to Paige. She takes her tickets back. But then she walks back over to the girl and gives the girl all of her tickets.

The Mom is beyond thankful and the little girl looks at AJ like she’s her superhero. And then AJ walks with her to the counter. The little girl happily gets one of the biggest prizes on the shelf and thanks AJ with the tiniest, cutest voice Paige thinks she’s ever heard. The Mom and daughter leave after that and AJ skips back over to Paige happily and kisses her on the cheek. She asks if Paige is still ready to go and Paige just stares at her and nods dumbly.

AJ smiles and grabs her hand, tugging her out of the arcade. On the way back, AJ mentions how cute the girl was but says nothing else about it. Instead she talks happily about how much fun the night was with Paige and how perfect of a first date it was. 

And Paige drives the car trying her best to listen. But the only thing she can think about is how kind AJ was to that little girl. And how she doesn’t think a single other person on the WWE roster (herself included) would have done all that. And AJ did it without a single hesitation. When she didnt have to. God help her.

This woman is absolutely crazy. But...maybe.. it wouldn’t be so bad to be married to her after all..

[duhragonball]

Sorry about all the weird asks you been getting, Here is an actual question: What do you think of Bray Wyatt's current fiend character?

Technically, this should be addressed on the wrestling blog, but I get them mixed up myself all the time, and let’s be real: duhragonball > buttdawg >>> imatlasarrestmeplease.  

In any case, I don’t have strong opinions about The Fiend, because I stopped watching WWE in October 2018, before The Fiend’s debut.   I think I have a general idea of what the character is supposed to be, but it’s probably not fair to judge it on hearsay.    So take this with a few hundred grains of salt.  

From what I understand, Bray Wyatt sort of dropped off the map for a while, then returned at... was it Summerslam ‘19?   I think it was.    He came back as the Fiend, who’s sort of like when Mick Foley switches from Mankind to Cactus Jack, only in this case The Fiend no-sells everything and he’s super strong.    Also, the Bray persona has become like this Mr. Rogers pastiche, and may not fully understand the Fiend’s actions.   

I have no idea how this Firefly Funhouse thing works.  I watched a pirated video of the John Cena “match” at WrestleMania 36, mostly because I wanted to understand what nWo Cena was supposed to be about.    I still have no idea, but I’m a huge nWo mark, so I was satisfied to see John rocking the black-and-white, even if it makes no sense.   

Actually, let me talk about nWo Cena for a minute here, because that’s been on my mind for a while, and I think it does sort of tie into Bray’s WWE career.   Okay, so for anyone who doesn’t know what I’m talking about, Cena and Bray had a match at WrestleMania 36 which was like some sort of Twilight Zone thing where Cena kept quantum leaping into different eras of wrestling history.   He found himself in the Hulkamania era, then he relived his own debut in 2002, and for some reason he was on the set of WCW Monday Nitro, circa 1997.   There, he was wearing an nWo shirt, indicating that he was supposed to be a member of the legendary heel stable, the New World Order.   

What struck my fancy about this was that I saw John wearing the shirt and for a moment I imagined how cool it would have been if Cena really had been part of the nWo.   The group had this amazing start in the summer of 1996, but by 1997 it was running on fumes, and in 1998 they had absolutely no idea what to do with it.    After that, they just kept breaking up and reuniting over and over, trying to recapture the old magic.   There were a lot of problems with the nWo, but I think the biggest one is that there was no clear identity of the group.   Somtimes it was a bunch of cool dudes having a violent party, and other times it was Hulk Hogan’s personal cult.  Other times it was just Hall and Nash wearing matching shirts.    It didn’t matter in the early years, but when the group got older and the older members moved on, there was nothing to define what was left.   

I’ve only been watching New Japan for about a year, but I’m already impressed with how Bullet Club has managed to avoid the same problem.   Let’s face it, they’re a baldface ripoff of the nWo concept, but they have defining characteristics that don’t just rely on a specific person.   Prince Devitt (Finn Balor) was a founding member, but he’s been gone for years.   Then AJ Styles was their #1 guy, and he left.   Then Kenny Omega was their leader, and I showed up a few months after he left.     I thought the BC was doomed to decline after that, but then I saw how dominant their new leader, Jay White could be, and then they replenished their ranks with KENTA.   Generally, Bullet Club is a gaijin stable, so that sets the tone for their act rather than any single person.   If a Canadian leaves, you just get a New Zealander to replace him.   But with the pandemic keeping most of BC out of Japan, they adapted again and brought in EVIL as their new top guy.   It’s impressive to me, because NJPW figured out a way to make the nWo an evergreen angle.   They can sell those T-Shirts for the next fifty years.   

But I still miss the classic nWo, and I liked the idea that in some AU, John Cena might have formed his own nWo revival around 2011 or so, and they could have done it right.    Imagine someone with Cena’s prestige and longevity doing a heel stable like that, and when his time is over, he hands it off to another big star who can carry the torch.  “If only they had John Cena,” I thought to myself.  “He could have righted the ship.   He could have fixed it.”

Which brings me back to Bray Wyatt, because the vibe I get is that Bray’s fans seem more focused on what could be, and what might have been.   Bray’s entire WWE run feels like a running effort to fix Bray’s entire WWE run.   He started as Husky Harris in NXT, then they brought the entire NXT roster out as a new heel stable, the Nexus, and had them run roughshod over WWE, except they were mostly too green for that role, and they kept losing big matches to Cena and Orton.    Then CM Punk took over Nexus and they became his faceless sidekicks, and then they vanished altogether when Punk moved into his Pipebomb era.  

Then Husky came back as Bray Wyatt, and everyone loved the gimmick.   I never cared for it personally, because I never saw much of Waylon Mercy, and I’ve never watched “Cape Fear”.   But people loved it.   But he kept losing the big matches.   Then he comes back as The Fiend, and now he’s like invincible or something, and it seems like he’s finally on track to get the success people wanted him to have before.  

Only, I don’t think it’s worked out that well.   They made him invincible, but they don’t seem to know what to do with that.    This led to that Hell in a Cell where Seth Rollins got “disqualified” in a no-DQ match.    They literally couldn’t decide how to end the match, or who should win, so they just stopped it for no reason.    That’s a long-term WWE problem.    Vince can’t make up his mind, so he just doesn’t put anyone over.    He didn’t want Seth to look weak losing to the Fiend, even though the Fiend is literally a monster, and he didn’t want the Fiend to win the title because he’d eventually have to lose it later.    Except the Fiend did win the title eventually, only to lose it to a 50 year old Goldberg in Saudi Arabia.   So Vince’s efforts to protect the Fiend at HiaC were ultimately pointless.    

I’m not sure where the Fiend character is now, but I think he may have turned face, and Alexa Bliss is his girlfriend?  Sith Apprentice?    I see people saying she’s possessed?   Well, whatever, I like what she’s done with her hair lately.   Every time they revamp Bray, I always hear fans suggest that they’re finally going to have Sister Abagail debut.    No one even knows who or what Sister Abagail is.    She’s just a name Bray used to mention during his creepy promos, and I think Randy Orton desecrated her grave one time.    Wrestling’s pretty great.  

Here’s the thing, I’m 100% in favor of a real, live SIster Abagail character.   I’ve written a 600,000-word novel about a background character in Dragon Ball Z, and at least thirty chapters were devoted to the Shockmaster.    I remember in 1997, when everyone thought Kane was dead, and then he finally showed up and set everything on fire for the next twenty years straight.    I still want to know who the Black Scoprion really was.   If Sister Abagail turns out to be an on-screen character, it’d be amazing.   Maybe Alexa Bliss is supposed to be turning into Abagail somehow.   She needs to dress up more like a ghost, though.   

The problem is that--right now-- there isn’t a Sister Abagail, so until the real thing is introduced, it’s just a hypothetical that everyone can pin their hopes and dreams on.   “Oh once they pull the trigger on Sister Abagail, Bray will finally get the push he deserves!”   “Yeah, that last Fiend match wasn’t so hot, but it’s all building up to the big payoff when they finally bring out Sister Abagail.”   “Sister Abagail will fix it, she can right the ship.”  

What I’m worried about is that one of these years Bray’s going to retire from wrestling, hopefully on his own terms, but his fans will still be waiting for a dream storyline, long after his actual career has passed them by.   I guess there’s problems with his run, mostly systemic problems with WWE’s booking philosophies and indecision, and fans are praying for a miracle to fix it all, like John Cena in an nWo shirt.   And even if they did bring out a Sister Agagail, it would never live up to the fans’ expectations.    It just feels like everyone’s setting themselves up for a disappointment.  

And that’s one of the reasons why I quit watching WWE.   At some point I realized that there just isn’t going to be a light at the end of the tunnel, a big match that somehow makes up for all of the dumb ideas and bad finishes I’ve seen over the years.    I’m all about AEW and NJPW now, and those promotions aren’t always perfect, but they are a lot better about meeting my expectations.  

I guess, when all is said and done, my big opinion on the Fiend is that I hope Bray lets his WWE contract expire and shows up someplace else.  He’s a great talent, no denying that.   I just don’t trust WWE to do right by him creatively. I think they want to push him, but they don’t know how to push guys anymore.   

[esotheria-sims]

I had some requested hairs pending, and now after what seems like 874517 years I am finally posting them! 

MYOS mhair14 retextured

First up, an old MYOS hair requested anonymously here. This one gave me a lot of grief: it had a bazillion groups (half of which were completely useless), the texture files were tiny and blurry as heck, and it had some really weird parts that I had no idea what to do with (like those random braid thingies hanging off the sides). I nearly gave up on it, but then @digitalangels saved the day by suggesting that I enlarge the texture files and blank out the groups that aren’t used by the mesh. I also replaced the random braids by equally random dreadlocks in a surge of inspiration. The texture is still far from perfect, despite my best efforts… but this is an old mesh, it’s as good as it gets.

INFO: Retextured in Furbyq’s PookQ textures + Rented-Space’s 3t2 EA and Kijiko dreadlocks. Comes in all of Pooklet’s and Io’s natural colors (Swatch). Grey linked to black, five optional custom greys included.Toddler-Elder. Mesh by Myos included.

CREDITS: MYOS, FurbyQ, Pooklet, Io, Aweeshie, Hat, Rented-Space, CatOfEvilGenius.

*Additional credits: Digitalangels, for her kind help and suggestions.

Angles  |  DOWNLOAD (Sfs)  |  DOWNLOAD (Box)

Rented-Space’s 3t2 Romantic Style retextured

This one wasn’t requested, but I did it as a back-up option back when I wasn’t sure whether I could finish the Myos hair. Figured I might as well toss it into this post, as a bonus of sorts.

INFO: Retextured with Io’s edit of Pooklet’s textures and in both of their natural color palettes (Swatch). Grey linked to black, five optional custom greys included.Toddler-Elder. Mesh by Rented-Space included.

CREDITS: EA, Rented-Space, Pooklet, Io, Aweeshie, Hat, CatOfEvilGenius.

*Additional credits: @uranium-z for their sim Hiroyuki, who is modelling the black hair in my preview.

Angles  |  DOWNLOAD (Sfs)  |  DOWNLOAD (Box)

Raon FH64 dyed - naturals & unnaturals

Another requested hair. I had little to go by with this one (anon only asked for the hair to be ‘dark at the roots and light at the ends’), so I improvised a bit. The dyejob on the hair is inspired by these old retextures by Problematique - I actually had to handpiant the fringe, which is something I've never tried before. Mind you, my retextures don't look 100% like Bosie's, but I'm still happy with how they turned out. There's a handful of natural and unnatural color combos in the download, and I also included the .PSD I made for this purpose, to make further retexturing easier.

INFO: Base texture by Lace. Comes in a total of 20 color combos - 3 binned families and 8 additional custom colors (Swatch). Elders keep their colors, but there's a Mailbomb/Pipebomb combo included in the custom bin that can pass for elder grey. All files are tooltipped, compressorized and clearly named.There's a folder with pictures of each color included in the download, as well as a PSD file. Mesh by Raon included.

CREDITS: Raon, Lace, Pooklet, Io, FurbyQ, Aweeshie, Hat, CatOfEvilGenius.

*Additional credits: Bosie, for her dyed retextures of Raon 64 which I took inspiration from, and @marvelann for her sim Bruna, who is modelling the TNT-Flashpowder combo in the unnaturals preview. 

Angles  |  DOWNLOAD (Sfs)  |  DOWNLOAD (Box)

XM Sims SueG mhair4 retextured

The third and final requested hair. Compared to the other ones, this was a breeze - and all thanks to @rented-space, who not only provided a nice base texture which I could use, but also edited the mesh to be for all ages (the original was only for teens and up). 

INFO: Retextured with Pooklet’s v3 textures and in all of Io’s and Pooklet’s naturals (Swatch). Grey linked to black, five optional custom greys included. Toddler-Elder (was previously only for teens, adults and elders). Edited all-ages mesh by Rented-Space included.

CREDITS: SueG, Rented-Space, Pooklet, Io, Aweeshie, Hat, CatOfEvilGenius.

Angles  |  DOWNLOAD (Sfs)  |  DOWNLOAD (Box)

[nikkisawas]

Just another Bella defense post because I'm tired of people using the same 5 excuses to hate them

@asias4life I don’t know why but I can’t reblog your post, maybe I wrote too much. Here’s my answer anyway since it’s a pipebomb for the Bella Army: 

I’ll sip your tea very slowly and throw it back at you if you don’t mind :) As a Bella supporter I’ll debate with you, seems way more productive don’t you think? It’s kinda lame and dumb to debate with people who share the same opinion and negate the very idea of debates. Ok, let’s start.

1) Ok, you didn’t word it as “The Bellas can’t wrestle” but that’s what you were implying, otherwise why would even bring them up as an example in the same category as Eva Marie? And I still would like to know what do the Bellas have to do with the RUMORED releases. Summer has been in danger for ages, they would have released her last year had Cameron kept her mouth shut. And if they are as powerful as you people think they are wouldn’t it’d be super easy for them to save Nattie? You know, their BEST FRIEND IN THE BUSINESS??? Or Renee, who’s also a good friend? This is just dumb, I hope you realize it.

Eva is not the first nor will she be the last to use WWE as a stepping stone, do you really want to blame her for seizing an opportunity? And in case you don’t know, Eva can’t just decide NOT to come back, if WWE asks she has to show up or she’ll be fired. She hinted she wanted to come back, but it’s clear they never intended to do so. I guess they see her as some kind of failed experiment and already have Mandy ready to replace her. She saw better opportunities and took them. At this point WWE probably just wants a bit of mainstream publicity so that she can be announced as WWE Superstar Eva Marie for her movie role, she’ll be released at the end of contract and she seems to be happier this way as wrestling was never her main goal. She never won any titles nor did she hijack important storyline, her Smackdown run was actually entertaining and would have probably led to some huge payoff for Becky or Naomi, so I really don’t get why you’re so mad about her being successful outside of WWE. Shouldn’t you be happy she’s gone?

And I still would like to know who told you that they are firing those girls to keep the Bellas, because you are the only one I have heard that from. You say Vince wants them because they are model-like, then why would he want to fire Summer who posed on Maxim and is trying to get a spot on Sports Illustrated? Why did he fire Cameron and hired Ruby and Nikki Cross? There are PLENTY of hot girls that got let go, WWE wants to keep the Bellas because they are valuable. They built an empire on their name, they are no regular hot girls, they are the most mainstream women they’ve ever had, featured on two reality shows, always invited to talk shows, red carpets, etc… Like it or not the Bellas are popular and have a huge following that goes beyond WWE, something that other girls are not able to provide. So why would they let go such a profitable name? They sell almost double merch as Sasha does, and that’s saying a lot considering Sasha is basically the queen of merchandise. I thought a “Smart Wrestling Fan” was supposed to understand how business work…

And who cares if Total Divas helped them, seriously? They were smart enough to capitalize on their success and turn it into money. Nikki’s wedding will probably get more attention than a regular PPV because her and her sister and marketing masterminds and secured a future for themselves. They are shitting money at this point and it’s thanks to them being smart enough to create their own empire.

I also don’t get the dislike for Mandy. She got hired for her looks, yes no doubt about that. But since then (2015) she has appeared on TV only a handful of times and has been training ever since, always wrestling on house shows and even getting good reviews for her work. So why do you want to defend Summer, who also got hired for her looks and improved a lot thanks to NXT (sounds familiar….?), but want to shame Mandy? Hot doesn’t mean she’s awful, at least give her chance. Daria is getting pushed ahead of her, she’s not done anything of note since getting hired while working on her skills, I thought you just said you would have appreciated Eva if she was training? Well, Mandy is Eva with actual training a drive to improve.

2) WWE wasn’t their first choice, I’ll never disagree with you on that and who says the contrary probably doesn’t know much about those two. But so what?? I’ve decided what I wanted to do with my life after the first year of college and swapped courses, does that make me not passionate about what I’m doing? And I don’t get why you’re singling out the Bellas when there are TONS of people (male and female) that didn’t care about WWE before getting hired and developed a passion for the business while working for them. Why would you doubt their passion and love for wrestling just because it wasn’t their first choice? What does it matter with anything?? What’s important is that they are passionate NOW and it can’t be denied because Nikki came back from a really bad injury despite already having money, fame and a rich boyfriend. Brie had a C-section and her first thought was to get back in the ring. They also never miss the chance to talk about the other women in a positive light, no matter if it’s during an interview, a podcast, on Instagram, Twitter, etc… even when they don’t have to.

They began in 2007, but do you want to know why it took them so long to improve and why there’s such a huge difference between them and Sasha? Sasha was trained as a WRESTLER first in the indies and then under Sara Del Rey. They were trained in FCW, where the trainers had different routines for the girls, they did not want them to be proper wrestler that’s why they were taught the most basic moves and that’s why most girls from that era were not as exciting as today’s girl. Plenty of people confirmed that and said girls were simply not allowed to be or to get good. The only ones who could somehow stand out were the ones who trained outside of WWE before getting hired. Gail Kim talked about it, the girls were not allowed to do anything cool, Melina and Michelle got in trouble for a simple dropkick and this attitude reflected on the way developmental girls were trained.

Even after getting called up to the main roster they were treated as nothing more than clones, working 3 minutes matches against the same opponents over and over again. In this climate GAIL KIM AND MICKIE JAMES had a horrible, awful match, so do you really think that you can blame the Bellas for how they were performing at the time? They quit because they were tired of being treated as human crutches for the Guest Hosts, tried to pursue a new career and ended up getting back full of new ideas. I’d also like to point out that Nikki started dating Cena BEFORE quitting, so how come he didn’t have her pushed then…? And you can hardly blame them for Total Divas, they saw an opportunity and got it. People like Naomi benefitted a lot from TD, because she was finally allowed to show her personality outside of being “Black Dancer #1″ and her fanbase grew exponentially. Hell, I didn’t care about her before TD and now she’s among my favorites! TD is giving girls more exposure and more money, so I will never understand why you people shit on it so much.

After the Bellas came back they took the ball and ran with it. They were finally allowed to be something more than twins, developed their own personas and each created a different moveset, Nikki being more power-based and Brie using her agility. They got over and Brie’s program with Stephanie was actually one of the best written storylines of the last years with the crowd invested in it, it got both women over and Nikki’s heel turn was perfectly executed. Unfortunately after that they completely ruined the Bella vs Bella feud and Brie turned heel without any explanation, but they don’t book themselves

Now, to their wrestling ability. If you really are as open minded as your bio suggest I ask you watch these videos https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z0vTiMB48mE, (ignore the title, it’s clickbait) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sBTpGaoaJdk

^This guys analyses their wrestling abilities, psychology, selling etc and comes to the golden conclusion: people already have a certain perception that the Bellas are awful, so no amount of improvements or good matches will make them change their mind. I ask you again to watch the videos, with no prejudices, because he explains my point and their abilities perfectly.

Nikki’s moveset is actually really cool and it works for her, she’s added plenty of offense that highlights her strenghts. She has one of the best forearm smash in business (Nikkisawa!!) it’s vicious and it legit looks like it could knock you out. Her Alabama Slam is another example of this. And the Rack Attack was perfect for her, but had to quit it unfortunately. Brie’s is a bit more lacking and she just ended up adapting Daniel’s moves, but it works for her as well. She was acknowledged as Daniel’s wife on TV, everybody knows, so there’s nothing wrong with getting a bit of a cheap pop with some Yes Kicks. And her Yes Lock was p e r f e c t, her missile dropkick looks amazing. I feel Nikki is the better wrestler of the two, but Brie just had less chances to show it always being the fall girl.

Natalya is the better wrestler among them, no doubt about that, but she has ages of experience on her back so it’s not really a fair comparison. Naomi is amazing, she incorporated her athleticism in her repertoire and is very creative, always busting out some new offense, but that’s unique to her. Nikki is a powerhouse, she can’t do what Naomi does because that’s not her. And do you really want to use Paige as an example…? I like her, I really do, but her main roster run was a mess. She got lazy and her move sets consisted of knee strikes, screams and headbutts, while Nikki and Brie always bring some new move. (And I’m hard on her because her NXT work was so much better= This just shows how biased you are towards them. If you don’t enjoy them or their styles it’s perfectly fine, but don’t use stupid excuses please. Because the logic you are applying to the Bellas could be applied to some of the girls you were defending and I don’t see you doing that :)

You want to complain about character, but there are really no great characters nowadays. Sasha’s character work in NXT was GOAT (I consider her to be one of best at this, she just gets it) but what exactly is her character on the main roster? They stripped her of everything “Boss” but the name, turning the once fierce Legit tough girl of NXT into a whiny little girl that cries about her childhood dreams and can’t win on PPV. What’s Becky’s character besides being an underdog that likes steampunk? Summer? Emma? Dana? Nattie is basically female Bret Hart without the success. Once again you are blaming the Bellas for something that happens to every girl. The girls on the main roster are given no chances to actually develop and show their character besides few glimpses.

And being sexy IS part of Nikki’s appeal, but it’s not all of it. (The Bella Booty shake is iconic, leave it alone!) As a heel she’s the cocky ex tomboy that was able to turn her life around climbing to the top and will do anything to stay in her rightful position, even if it means cheating. As a babyface she is the veteran that has to prove she still belongs there and can hang with the new crop of girls. Brie unfortunately didn’t get as many chances to prove herself as Nikki did, but her feud vs Steph showed how much of a fiery babyface she is when given the opportunity. She’s the mother bear who would do anything to protect what she holds dear, no matter what obstacles are in front of her. She was ready to take on her boss, with the entire WWE machine behind her, just so that she could protect her sister and avenge her husband. She was ready to face the Queen of WWE because she badmouthed her family.

And if you want to blame the Bellas for their face/heel swaps I would like to see you do the same for Alicia Fox, because she was in the same situation changing sides more than I change underwear. Do you know who else is a victim of this? Big Show. And do you know who’s to blame? Bad booking. For the last time, despite what you people think, THE BELLAS DON’T BOOK THEMSELVES.

And despite having Cena on their side their booking has been horrendous almost all the time. Nikki had to stand there and listen while AJ insulted and slut shamed her week in week out, without ever having the chance to fire back. She did once and her promo got cut because AJ got upset. Also, they were not in the title picture since 2010. Where did you get that? Both Brie and Nikki had a shitty reign during their first run, than took a back seat to other girls and had to wait late 2014 to get a championship run because at first Vince didn’t want girls on Total Divas to win the title (which is also one of the reasons AJ held onto the belt for so long and they had to call up Paige, because they had her bury the entire division and there were no more contenders).

The Bellas are not the best the WWE has to offer, but they are good enough to be where they are. They were smart enough to turn themselves into superstars outside of WWE. I know many refuse to admit but they made their names mean something and are a huge attraction. Nikki’s queue at access was one of the longest, they have a HUGE social media followings, Nikki’s videos were among the most streamed in 2017 (she was the only girls on the list and ahead of Rollins, Owens, Balor, etc..), their merch is the always among the highest selling. They have a great business mind and were able to market themselves to a HUGE following, bigger than any other girl in the WWE.

So I don’t think they are as good as the horsewomen in ring, I’ve never thought so, but they are good enough to deserve the spot they have when you count the total package and what they bring to the table. Plenty of girls have been in their position but they were the only ones able to turn this opportunity into gold. (And the entire argument is silly considering Brie was basically a jobber and Nikki never even came close to the title and Alexa/Naomi/Becky were pushed ahead of her…)

Little girls everywhere look up to them, so they must be doing something right.

3) People can complain all they want about Nikki beating AJ’s reign, but regardless of the reasons it will not change the fact that giving the accolade to her was a good thing. Do you want to know who was the number one benefactor of Nikki’s reign being the longest? Charlotte. WWE was promoting a revolution, right? And every revolution needs a dictator, a old regime to tear down. In this case, Nikki was the villain that Team PCB and Team BAD had to defeat. Beating Nikki, the longest reigning Divas champion, immediately made Charlotte feel like a big deal on the main roster, she succeeded where many other girls failed and finally brought down the Bella Empire on her own. Do you think it would have been as powerful had Nikki held the belt for a couple of months….? No. Same thing happened with Carmella. She was not feuding with some nobody, she had the guts to attack the longest reigning divas champion. It made her feel like a bigger deal and legitimized her. Working with Nikki elevated her to the level she’s now at, as Carmella herself said (thanking Nikki) in her podcast with Lillian Garcia. With the record staying with AJ none of this would have been possible, because she walked out. (I’m not blaming her, the situation she was in must have been very uncomfortable) So instead of bitching about it (as if AJ’s accomplishments were closely tied to that record…) why don’t you people concentrate to the positive things it brought? But no, John Cena helped her, CM Punk yada yada

Oh, and in case you didn’t know, AJ was Vince’s favorite girl. He himself gave her the green light for the pipebomb (when the other girls were barely allowed to hold a mic) to bury the other girls and if she decided to come back she would be welcomed with open arms.  

Once again you are blaming the Bellas for something they have no part of. Was Nikki’s reign badly booked? YES. She faced Paige like a thousand times, she always won by Twin Magic and they never truly established her as a dominant single wrestler despite being the Golden Girl. But how can you blame her for this? Did you know that Nikki proposed to have a weekly open challenge for her title but WWE turned that down and gave it John Cena? Did you know Nikki always asked to get the Horsewomen called up to shake up the stale Divas division? Or that she was ALWAYS pushing for stipulation matches and more exciting stories? Of course not, and if you do you’re choosing to ignore it because it doesn’t fit your “Bellas are bad for business” agenda. Nikki and Brie were victims of the bad booking and mistreatment just as much as the others despite being the cover girls for that period. Nikki and Brie were ALWAYS complaining about the situation, at ComiCons, in interviews, etc…

“Nikki went 72 days without defending the title, AJ went 70 at most” I hope you realized yourself how dumb and biased this sounds, I won’t even comment.  

Michelle McCool was rumored to be heavily favored by the bookers because of the Undertaker, where’s the hate for that? And were you backstage when she was getting heat for dating Taker? Do you know he’s as influent and powerful as Cena is? So why would they fear Cena and but have no problem pissing off the most respected man in the locker room? Even CENA respects Taker and knows better than to mistreat him. Sounds stupid to me.Taker can end careers just as much as Cena can but once again this doesn’t fit the anti-Bellas agenda.

And you can talk about the Bellas being able to get away with everything as much as you want but that doesn’t change the fact that they got pushed AFTER getting popular (Nikki started dating Cena in 2012, got the title in late 2014) were victims of bad booking just as much as everybody else (Where’s Nikki’s monster push?? And Brie was basically a jobber and an afterthought) and had to stand there and listen to people calling them plastic mannequins, telling them that they slept their way to the top, that they were not real wrestlers because of TD over and over again without a chance to fire back. (They did once and their promo got cut, even Cena got upset and defended Nikki on Twitter) Cena’s powers are legit lame if his politicking to get the Bellas pushed put them in this situation.

In conclusion. Do I think being John Cena’s girlfriend helped Nikki? Yes, it would be stupid to say otherwise. Is John Cena the sole reason the Bellas are where they are now? HELL NO! They worked hard and deserved their spot.

4) Wow, such a great wrestling fan you are downplaying an injury like that. NIKKI WAS ONE BAD BUMP AWAY FROM BEING PARALYZED! Neck injuries are no joke, Edge had to retire from that. Tyson Kidd ALMOST DIED because of a neck injury. So yeah, forgive us if we think the story of a girl who already has everything and could spend the rest of her days wiping her ass with money but she decided to put her health on the line AGAIN so that she can live her passion for a bit longer is exciting. Nikki came back with a FULL SCHEDULE when she didn’t need to, she got booked in plenty of physical fights, No DQ matches etc… Because she’s PASSIONATE ABOUT IT! Brie had a C-SECTION two months ago and she’s already training to get back because she’s PASSIONATE ABOUT IT!

If you don’t like the Bellas that’s perfectly fine, we can’t all like the same things, but don’t spin your opinion into facts especially if most of your reasons to hate on the Bellas are the tired excuse them not being passionate, Cena, bad booking (that you conveniently don’t apply to other girls) and your own perception of their wrestling ability, comparing them to girls who were lucky enough to be treated as wrestlers and not some good looking clones.

Charlotte looks up to Nikki, Becky loves them, plenty of respectable people in the business have nothing but nice things to say about those two in and out of the ring, so I’ll take their opinion over yours if you don’t mind.

PS. using Pipebomb and Tea to describe your own opinion on facts that have been repeated over and over and over again as if you have made some great discovery is kinda lame…

[closetofanxiety]

Show Review: Women’s Wrestling Revolution, “The Show Must Go On”

Hey! I went to this show a couple of weeks ago and then forgot to review it. Let’s remedy that. 

When: Sunday, August 20, 2017, with a 3 p.m. bell time

Where: The Aurora Nightclub in beautiful “downcity” Providence, R.I.

Who: A crowd north of a hundred?

Show notes: This is going to be the last WWR show at Aurora, because the block is being turned into luxury condos. That’s a huge bummer. The gentrification of Providence is ticking over from, “Ah, good, it’s nice to see people moving back to the city” to “Only wealthy assholes can afford to live here.” Also, this show is named after one of the best Queen songs. If you meet someone who doesn’t like Queen, here’s my advice: be very suspicious of that person.

Allie Recks vs. Elena Pogosyan

These two were totally new to me. WWR kind of likes to start off with unknowns in the first match, much like Shine does with their “Sparkle Showcase” matches. Normally that means the first match is usually bad, but in this case it was a fast-paced, spot-heavy duel between two evenly matched opponents.  Pogosyan was the heel, working an arrogant Armenian-American princess gimmick which, for a fan of obscure ethnic groups like me, was catnip. She also executed a truly brutal-looking curb stomp on Recks, who ultimately got the win. Pogosyan’s Twitter bio describes her as “Half Journalist, Half Wrestler, All Armenian.” I’M INTRIGUED. This was really short, but that’s not bad. Too many matches are too goddamned long.

Rating: Three luxury condos.

Maria Manic w/Penelope Ford vs Davienne w/Sammi Lane

I feel like Maria Manic is what Candy Cartwright is trying to pull off. Like, Maria already does that really well, so there’s no need for someone to do it poorly. But Candy Cartwright wasn’t in this match: local villainness Davienne was. This was kind of the WWR equivalent of the hoss fight, with a lot of brawling and stiff forearms. Sammi Lane kept getting involved, so Penelope Ford would get involved as the equalizer. Not a bad match, but nothing spectacular.

Rating: Two and a half luxury condos.

Terra Calaway vs Skylar

Skylar is hugely over with this crowd, despite coming out to the ring to a Reel Big Fish song. Listen, don’t get me wrong, I like some Reel Big Fish songs, it’s just that it’s the kind of musical love that dare not speak its name. Terra Calaway is a much, much larger woman who came out with a big dinosaur skull mask. She is the “Queen of the Dinosaurs.” I’m here for it. I love gimmicks that are rooted in prehistory. This is your classic monster heel vs plucky face battle, and both are really good at their roles, although Calaway is maybe too funny. That’s one of the things these days, you know; heels cracking jokes and stuff. We’re supposed to hate you, stop being funny.

Anyway, Skylar takes a beating for most of the match, rallies to come back, but then loses after a full nelson slam. That’s awesome. We don’t see enough nelsons, full or half, in wrestling. 

Rating: Three luxury condos.

Willow Nightingale vs Vanity

The crowd likes both these women, and although Vanity nobly tried to play the heel, it resulted in kind of a lukewarm match overall. There was also an extended sequence in the match that turned on the question of whether kicks to the groin are as painful to women as to men, one of the great scientific questions of our day that wrestling is unafraid to answer. Lots of brawling around in the crowd on this one as well, which I have mixed feelings about.

I like both these wrestlers, but they need to work on their characters a bit, since both are a little vague. Willow is a Bayley-esque fun-loving happy person, a little? Kind of? And Vanity is a sexxxy dominatrix villain, although not really? We need to sharpen those lines, ladies.

Rating: Two luxury condos.

Shine Nova Championship: Priscilla Kelly (c) vs Jordynne Grace

These are two of Shine’s hot new stars, Shine being in need of hot new stars because they alienated many of the old stars! I want to emphasize here how much I love when a company lets its titles be defended on another company’s show, even though that pretty much telegraphs the result of the match well in advance.

Still, these are two of the top up-and-coming women in wrestling right now, and this was a great contest. It was my first time seeing Kelly in person, and she did not disappoint: she’s really good in the ring without being clearly one type of wrestler or another. She knows how to work the crowd and pace a match and tell a story physically, which is oddly rare nowadays, when too many people are focused on the “get your shit in” aspect of matches.

She overdoes the dangerously sexxxy thing, of course, and on this show it was dialed way up, to absurd levels: putting her hands down the front of her trunks, constantly licking and biting Jordynne Grace, crawling around on all fours and whipping her hair around like she was in a Whitesnake video in 1987. It was nuts. It was an afternoon show and there were little kids in the crowd! A dad in front of me kept covering his son’s eyes. That father-son duo had a really weird dynamic that I wish I could explain, though. This is why it’s bad to go to shows by yourself, because when you see things that need unpacking there’s no one to bounce ideas off of. 

Anyway, the match. Grace is rapidly becoming one of my favorite wrestlers. She can do a whole lot already, and is picking up the rest with alarming speed. She threw the smaller woman around for most of the match, but kept succumbing to Kelly’s vampishly evil tactics. The home stretch featured a couple of great near falls and ultimately Kelly getting the win via submission. Good stuff!

Rating: Four luxury condos.

The Sea Stars (Delmi Exo & Ashley Vox) vs. Team Adams (Karen Q and Tasha Steelz)

OK, first things first: Karen Q rules. I first saw her maybe a year ago and though, “Gosh, that wrestler shows promise,” and now, not much time later, when I see her name on a card I think, “I am in for some topnotch wrestling, courtesy of Karen Q.” She’s currently stranded in the wilderness of Women of Honor, but check her stuff out. She’s great.

Team Adams are the villains here. The Sea Stars offer to start the match off with a round of shots, and Team Adams cravenly uses the opportunity to start beating on their opponents before the bell. 

The ref eventually restores order, and the heels take control. Q is terrific, Steelz is good, and the Sea Stars are coming along. They’re not bad or anything, but there’s a clear and obvious skill differential between the two teams that makes the match a bit clunky at points. One thing I liked: both teams are actually TEAMS, instead of just two wrestlers randomly paired up for a night. 

Team Adams gets the win thanks to some interference from two of my favorite Masshole dirtbags, Taeler Hendrix and The Artist Formerly Known As Alexxa Neveah.

Rating: Three luxury condos.

Sonya Strong vs Gabriela Rios

Gabriela Rios is the latest stage name for Gabi Castrovinci, who was Raquel in TNA. She’s going to retire from wrestling soon, she said on Twitter. That’s too bad! She was just getting good. This was the best singles match I’ve seen her have.

This was kind of a battle of exaggerated Latina archetypes, with Rios being the alluring Carnivale pinup queen and Strong being the Nuyorican hood chick who is just itching to beat your sorry ass. I thoroughly enjoyed that aspect of it. Throughout the match, Strong made a big show of having contempt for her opponent, constantly putting her in submission holds and barking, “I think this bitch thinks she’s the only one in this locker room with a big ass.” Because, that’s maybe half of Rios’ gimmick.

Rios mounts a few valiant comeback attempts, but this is mostly Strong’s show and she wins pretty handily. After the match, she grabs the microphone and starts running down Veda Scott. She breaks off when she sees Deonna Purrazzzo walking to the back and starts running down Deonna, saying she’s only getting the choice spots in shows because of her boyfriend (she is dating Marty Scurll). The crowd does that “OHHHHHH SHIT” thing and Deonna stands on the ring apron, making the “Two Sweet” hand gesture. Is this a shoot? Is this a PIPEBOMB? THE FOURTH WALL IS COLLAPSING!

I know some people hate this stuff, but I like it. I follow waaaay too many wrestlers on social media, this stuff is candy for me. Sonya vs. Deonna will be good money.

Rating: Three luxury condos.

The Twisted Sisterz (Holidead and Thunder Rosa) vs Taeler Hendrix and Alisha Edwards 

I really like the Twisted Sisterz. I got a mark picture with them during the intermission. They charge for pictures, and that’s Controversial, but I don’t give a shit. It’s a way to Support The Boys without having to buy a glossy 8x10 or a T-shirt I’ll never wear in public. And by God do I Support The Boys. On the census form, in the “race/ethnicity” category, where it says “Other” I write in, “Supporter Of The Boys.”

Anyway, they were facing New Bedford’s skeeziest, Taeler and Alisha, who was formerly Alexxis Neveah before becoming a TNA/Impact/GFW/Nick Gulas Promotions Knockout (TM). I can’t overstate my love for Alisha’s character: the loud, conniving, violent southeastern Massachusetts chick. The kind of woman who has a Tawm Brady jersey for formal occasions. The kind of woman who has to go to court because she punched out another mom while dropping kids off at kindergarten. I WOULDNA HIT HER IF SHE HADNA TAWKED SHIT ABOUT MY MAAAAN, YER ONNER.

Taeler is Taeler, and in the world that Priscilla Kelly is set to inherit, Taeler’s high school drama club femme fatale feels a little hollow. Kelly really comes across like the genuine sleazebag that Taeler is pretending to be. Taeler needs to drop that gimmick and embrace her inner New Bedfordian, change her name to Rosie O’Grady and come to the ring threatening to stab people with a roofing knife.

Interesting match! Lots of what I guess we can only call “lesbian chicken,” where the wrestlers try to intimidate each other with the kinds of unwanted personal advances that are grounds for termination in most workplaces. This was a very “Women’s Wrestling! (clap clap, clapclapclap) kind of crowd, so I’m not sure what the thinking behind the escalating sexxxiness was.

Apart from that, the Sisterz work really well together, and while Taeler and Alisha aren’t quite on their level as workers, both are nonetheless terrific at selling and overall ring psychology. Lots of dives to the outside, brawling through the crowd, and Team New Bedford trying to keep the larger, more powerful Holidead out of the ring. In a payback for the earlier tag match, the Sea Stars interfere, allowing the Twisted Sisterz to get the win.

Rating: Three and a half luxury condos.

Deonna Purrazzo vs Awesome Kong

This felt like a bonkers matchup, considering Kong is a cast member in the Netflix “GLOW” show (just picked up for another season) and doesn’t really do a lot of indie bookings. The crowd, which loves Purrazzo, went completely fucking nuts for Kong, though, as loud a reaction as any I’ve ever heard. It felt like a big deal, because it’s not the kind of thing we’ve seen a hundred times before.

The story of this match was obviously the giant vs the feisty babyface, and they had to work it in a way that didn’t blow Kong up completely. I mean, we all get older, and the reason Kong doesn’t work much anymore is because she doesn’t have the same physical abilities she had during her legendary feud with Gail Kim. So this wasn’t a marathon; it was a lot of Kong flinging Deonna around the ring, and Deonna trying to wear down the much larger woman. Eventually, Deonna got a Fujiwara Armbar applied in the center of the ring and Kong had to tap out, a result I’m not sure anyone expected. People went CRAZY. The dudes behind me were screaming their heads off like their favorite team had just won the Super Bowl. It was a great moment.

After the match, Deonna got on the microphone to do the “you fans make it all possible” babyface speech, and got in some digs at Sonya Strong. I want to see that match! 

Rating: Four luxury condos.